Thought Adjuster: “You have read the Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz—you can put them in two categories: the first one addresses how to successfully handle the curve balls that life throws at you— “Do not make assumptions” and “Do not take things personally.”  The second one addresses how to lead a meaningful and successful life—"Speak with integrity” and “Always do your best”.

“Let us address the first category, as its concise message is great advice on how to successfully deflect situations that would otherwise give rise to great inner turmoil.  How often do you make assumptions as to others’ intentions or behaviors?  How just are you in your assessments?  Unless you had a close and intimate connection with those individuals—as does their Divine Indweller—you are not privy to a staggering amount of their personal data that would mightily alter the way you look at them—their ancestral ‘hand-me-downs’, their family upbringing; their heart desires; their gifts and their handicaps, and so much more… 

“As well, your existence has its one-of-a-kind parameters and, as you well know, your perspective is frequently blurry as to the way you perceive what occurs in your life.  How then could you expect a perfect score from others?  Rather than assuming the worse, as many of you initially tend to do when faced with unsettling demeanors or events, what would happen if you took the opposite stand? 

“Just as you strive to 'always do your best’—even if your best falls short of your idealistic expectations—assume that others are also doing their best when they fall short of your own expectations.  As a part of the human race, you are in a good position to feel empathy and compassion toward your co-travelers.

“By abandoning your worst-case scenario assumptions, you become emotionally detached from what triggered your initial discomfort—which means that you are no longer taking this ‘the wrong personal way’.  What do I mean by that?

“You have no say in the pace of your siblings ‘evolution, but you have a strong one in your own, as you are sitting in the driver seat.  You are at the center of your own cosmos, so to speak, as your coordinates in time and space are unique and define your ‘head- and heart-quarters’. 

“Rather than ‘taking things personally’ with a negative connotation, take them ‘personally’ in an innovative and constructive way.  What are they teaching YOU?  What skills are they challenging YOU to hone?  This is what Jesus expressed in the parable of the mote and beam: “And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?” Indeed, human beings have a tendency to minimize their personal issues and maximize those of their siblings—which is contradicting the optical laws where what is closer to you appears bigger while what is more remote shrinks in size.

“This is where I come into play and can be of assistance.  I will help you search within for the keys to your inner enigmas.  Indeed, there is a telling mirror effect between your and your siblings’ behaviors.”