Thought Adjuster: “As you are asking for My input, you quiet your mind, as you have come to understand that I won’t speak to you unless I have gotten your undivided attention. This is what active listening is all about and it is a skill that needs to be mastered in all relationships.
“How could you ever get to know someone if you are constantly interrupting the flow of that person’s confidences and interjecting untimely and unsolicited observations. A genuine exchange is a respectful one. You could compare it to the communication between two radio operators. As they do not have a visual on each other, they ensure that they get to share the fullness of their message by punctuating each one of its sequences by “roger that” or “copy that”—which means ‘received and ‘understood’ in radio voice procedure. A role reversal where the listener becomes the speaker and conveys his thoughts and observations is then perfectly appropriate and welcome.
“Such a process is protected from interruptions but gives plenty of room for enlightening feedback. Indeed, once you have fully spoken your heart and mind, you know that your interlocutor, having become a depository of all pertinent data, is well equipped to offer you some wise and objective feedback as to your personal dilemma.
“Dear ones, our communication is not meant to be a monologue where one of us monopolizes the conversation. I listen when you speak—not that I don’t already know everything about you. Yet, by letting you articulate your thoughts and feelings, I also teach you how to listen to yourself—a skill that has to be developed within each one of you, as, too often, the power of your emotions takes over your mind and causes ‘brain freezes’.
“You will notice that such a self-expression does not come easy at first but, as you persevere in that process of full personal disclosure, I will silently ask you leading questions to take you deeper in that inner space of self-revelation that triggers these mighty ah-ha moments of personal enlightenment—Roger that!